Tuesday, September 16, 2014

So Emo...

An introspective night, thinking of someone who came and went from my life, like a hurricane. A friend recently said some relationships are short and sweet, but no less meaningful. So that is the one I think of in the dead of night - short, fraught with emotion, but no less meaningful for its short duration.

Tonight, I can't help but think of this man, this flawed, beautiful, funny man. And I wonder: beautiful man, do you ever think of me? Do you lie awake in the dark of night, wondering how I am, if I ever think of you? It's been a long time since I thought of this lovely man, but tonight, I can't help but wonder, and feel, and think that I'm glad I had the short time that I spent in his company. I call it my "girl brain," that irrational hunger to know where he is at. It's unhealthy, and nothing good can come of it, but I want to know: do you sometimes think of me, too, and wonder what might have been? Do you miss my jokes, and terrible selfies? I miss you, beautiful man. I hope you're well, and happy. I hope you smile everyday. And I hope you remember me with a smile, a fond memory of the girl that passed through your life.

I won't contact this man, even though I want to reach out. So I'll just write this blog, in the wee hours of the night, and let out my feelings, and tomorrow I'll wake up, make my coffee, and he'll be a fond memory once more. Goodnight, beautiful man, I miss you.

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Your Momma...

New tattoo, and the start of the full back piece! Oh, hey, I'mma have a back piece by the end of next year. This one is for my mother, who has been very ill lately. Next up is the other anchor for my father, then the pin-ups, and the fill-in for the rest. All traditional, all the back. I am excite!

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Photo Album: Tentacles Up!

Snapshots from the last year:
 Good times and ice cream with friends.

 Dressed for summer, ready to roll.

 4th of July with a furry friend.

 Buckley the elk.

 Birthday tide pooling.

Once again, stupid-long hair and a happy smile.

Uniform for the rest of the summer.

A Year Of Living Dangerously...

...not really. This is me now:
One year post-divorce. Several pounds lighter, with a much lighter heart and quite a few more tattoos. The Soctopus has done a lot of new things this year, and met a lot of new people. Most good people, a few bad, several quite odd. Dating has been a strange and enlightening experience, one that still continues. Internet dating: bad. Dating in general: often humerous, occasionally fun, sometimes heartbreaking. However, I still have a whole heart and a spring in my step.

I went on a date with a man wearing an Affliction t-shirt and embroidered jeans (true story). Hard not to hide my face in shame on that one...

I went on a date with a married man. (Also a true story. Not a happy one.)

I got stood up, and I stood up a few people.

Somehow, through it all, I kept learning and growing. Things I've learned: it's OK to be by myself. It's OK to say goodbye to unhealthy people and do right for yourself. Try new things. Say yes to unexpected adventures. Live a full life and never apologize for being yourself. Last but not least, I learned to say goodbye to the past.

One year of growth and change, one year of learning to live happily. One year of learning the new, true me. I like this me. I think I'll keep her.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

I Hate Moving

So, to recap the title: I hate moving. Moving sucks. You know what else sucks? Packing. Packing sucks. T-minus two weeks til moving, and guess who hasn't started to pack? Yeah. This girl. So how about we procrastinate with a list of what I'm doing lately?

1. New Books To Read:
- The Good Nurse
- The Violinist's Thumb
- The River of Doubt
- The Fault In Our Stars

2. Movies To See:
- The Grand Budapest Hotel (check and mark!)
- The Hobbit
- The Other Hobbit That Isn't The First One
-  Gravity
- American Hustle
- All Is Lost

3. Moving

4. Procrastinating

5. Packing

6. Procrastinating

7. Bacon Jam
(This is an actual thing that I'm making this week! It's jam! But with bacon! BACON!)

8. Miley Cyrus
I quite literally cannot and will not stop singing along with Miley. (Sing-a-long-aMiley?) This is clearly exactly what my choir teacher envisioned when she said I'd go far with a voice like this...

9. Lego LotR and Lego Indiana Jones video games
If I have to explain why, you're an awful person who deserves shaming.

10. Taxes
FML. No, really. FML.

So there you have it: what the Soctopus is up to. Exciting, scintillating, a little bit debased...or none of those things at all. I'll let you decide while I eat a bacon jam and cheese sandwich.

Monday, March 3, 2014

An Ode to Dragon

There are red lipsticks, and then there are red lipsticks. As every girl who wears red lipsticks knows, there is always one red that stands above the rest. Revlon Cherries In The Snow. A good, cherry-tinged, classic red. MAC Ruby Woo and Russian Red. And, last but not least, Chanel Dragon.

Dragon is, lamentably, discontinued. It came to us in two different incarnations, InfraRouge and Rouge Allure Laque. InfraRouge was a creamy, semi-matte lipstick, while Rouge Allure Laque was a long-lasting full-coverage stain/gloss. The lipstick version came first, and was EPIC. It was a true, darker blue-red, with subtle red-on-red shimmer. This lipstick changed my life. I wore it in high school, almost daily. I got married in Dragon. This color was my holy grail. And then Chanel discontinued it. For no reason. Dragon was a cult favorite from the day it was launched. It was a huge seller, and consistently sold out at cosmetics counters. But Chanel discontinued Dragon none the less, and for years, I lived a washed-out, Dragon-less life.

Then, suddenly, Chanel released a new product, Rouge Allure Laque, and, lo and behold, one of the shades was named "Dragon." Could it be? Was it the same Dragon I loved and lost? A quick run to Nordstrom confirmed that, yes, the formula was different, but the red was indeed Dragon!

I, however, only discovered the re-emergence of Dragon after Chanel had already discontinued it. So I went on a search across Washington and California, looking for the impossible dream: one last tube of Dragon that had, somehow, been passed over. (*Insert montage of storefronts passing by in the rain*) Dragon was nowhere to be found, as everyone else had already purchased the last few tubes. And back-ups. Finally, on vacation in San Diego, in Nordstrom, I found one tube of Dragon that another woman had on hold. The LAST tube of Dragon. And I convinced the Chanel clerk to sell that tube to me.

The end of this epic saga is that I own one last, coveted tube of Dragon, which I almost never wear. That blurry picture up top showcases the magic that is Dragon. Red. Slightly shimmery. Heavy. Sexy. It is, and will always be the best red. Until Chanel brings it back, AGAIN. (Note to Chanel: please do this...I will pay *almost* anything. Love, the Soctopus)

Thursday, February 27, 2014

An Interesting Question

So. The Soctopus had an interesting conversation today with a gentleman who had some things to say about tattoos in general, and women with tattoos in particular. Very interesting. The conversation raised a question I will put to you, internets, and I want your opinions and answers. Comments welcome, y'all.

What the conversation boiled down to was this gentleman's opinion that women with tattoos, particularly "sleeves" or heavy, serious ink, are somehow differentiating themselves as less educated, less attractive, and "loose." His opinion was that women with tattoos show poor judgement and a lack of self-respect. I countered his argument, using myself as an example: educated, graduated with honors, hold a management position in my chosen profession, and -ahem- attractive. He agreed that there are exceptions to his rules, but stood by his statements. The discussion was civil, but raised a lot of questions, first and foremost: is it discrimination to judge someone by their body art?

The obvious answer (and my gut-reaction) is "HELL YES!" If you judge me based on my tattoos, you are judging me based on my appearance, and making decisions about my character. This is, as we all can agree, inherently wrong-headed. However, the quandary is this: I am being judged based on a facet of my appearance that I chose to modify, which sets tattoo-based discrimination into a strange and unique category. The question I have is this: can it be considered discrimination when the judgement is made on an optional modification in appearance? In other words, I *chose* to be tattooed, and had complete control over it. I opted to modify my body in a permanent and visible way. Does that render me open to outside opinions and judgement, again, based solely on a facet of my appearance?

It's an interesting question, and one I've been thinking about. I welcome any and all comments and opinions, and am curious to see what you, faceless internet, think. My personal opinion is that most negative opinions around tattooed people have their roots in ignorance and bias, as well as long-held cultural stereotypes about people with tattoos. I believe it's time to judge someone based on their character more than their skin color (or colors, for those with body art). But then, I am someone with tattoos. So come on, internet! Let's have a discussion!